Breakup no be breakdown, breakup no be breakdown, breakup no be breakdown no be breakdown no be breakdown, thank you to my ex😀🎶 ~Kobi Rana
Happy happy weekend people! Are you familiar with the song above? (I wanted to get you smiling, did it work?😄) Well, today’s update is all about finding out more about heartbreaks/breakups to crown our discussions for this week. I also looked at how to spot the signs, suggestions on how to patch things up, and how to get over your broken heartedness. Read on!
Almost everyone older than 20 has suffered a heartbreak in one way or the other. After all, one can suffer a heartbreak though not in a relationship. This is because you are waiting and expecting what won’t be (Find out more https://realationship101online.wordpress.com/2020/08/07/what-are-situationships-find-out-now/) Also, one may be going through series of heartbreaks in a relationship setting due to certain questionable and careless actions or words of one’s partner. Merriam Webster’s dictionary describes heartbreak as crushing grief. Breakup is when series of heartbreaks and misunderstandings ultimately result in a split between the couple.
Spotting the signs long before the breakup gives you a little less height to fall from. Here are some pointers;
- Poor communication: When communication becomes infrequent, when you two talk less and less with each passing day, then a breakup is imminent.
- Weak connection: This is when the connection between you two grows weaker and weaker. She or he no longer “zings” to your “zang” (😄😄 don’t ask me what it means). Basically, you don’t feel connected or at ease, you don’t feel in sync with each other, then watch out.
- Constant bickering/unhealthy arguments: Have you two been having a lot of petty arguments lately? I mean, you start a conversation and before you know it you’re quarrelling already. In these arguments, instead of listening to each other’s viewpoint so as to resolve the issues, you two bad-mouth each other and simply act “childish”. Is this you? Or you just sink into your normal routine of the “silent treatment”. This is a clear indicator that a breakup is near.
- Changing Temperatures (Hot then suddenly Cold): When your partner becomes unpredictable in the sense that he suddenly moves from hot to cold and vice versa then something is wrong. I describe being hot as being overly nice and accommodating whilst to be cold is to be distant, uncaring and unloving. If this is happening way too often lately then she or he is having a mind battle. They are trying to figure out how to relay the news (breakup) to you.
- Outrightly blind: In this case, she or he no longer takes you into account in the relationship. They don’t see you. Your values, your contribution, your worth, and even your flaws. They just turn a blind eye to it all. Maybe because they are fed up. Things that used to matter do not matter anymore. A breakup is well on its way.
Patching things up to avoid breaking up;
It takes two to tango; when I go, you go.~Malcolm X
People say not every relationship can be saved. I say unless it was a case of abuse, you can work things out. (More on abuse here https://realationship101online.wordpress.com/2020/08/14/toxic-relationship-abuse-%f0%9f%a4%95/) As the quote rightly says, it takes two to tango, however, one can start and if the other cares, she or he will join you.
How can you patch things up with this person whom you love so dearly? How can you mend a relationship that seems broken? ANS: Communication! Yes. Communicate in both words and actions. Let this partner of yours know you still care, that you are willing to get past your many differences, that you want your relationship to succeed. I can’t stress this enough (More on communication here https://realationship101online.wordpress.com/2020/08/21/what-is-communication/). In subsequent updates, I will share with you “The Five Love Languages” as propounded by Dr. Gary Chapman. To highlight, knowing your partner’s love language allows you the opportunity to communicate to them on that level for them to feel loved, in return, they communicate their love for you in your own love language. Anticipate more, later🤩 For those who can’t wait, it’s actually a book and it can be gotten online for free, look it up.
Getting over Breakups/Heartbreaks;
Getting over your broken heartedness means choosing happiness in spite of your single status. It means deciding to live a happy life rather than giving in to a sullen, miserable existence. It means rediscovering, knowing and valuing your worth all over again. It means being confident and secure in who you are as an individual. It is possible. You can move on if you really want to. For more practical tips on staying “Happily Single”, visit my previous update (https://realationship101online.wordpress.com/2020/08/24/happily-single/).
I wish you the very best in this journey of loving, being loved and finding REALationships worth holding on to. Cheers!
NB: I am taking a one week break off blogging for personal reasons. I hope to be back with interesting updates and some new developments come Monday, September 07, 2020. Thanks for the support thus far!
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Let love blossom 🌺💖